Me and God are about to have words…
Kobe is gone. An icon who loved his daughter. He was an imperfect man who repped a good father. He was willing to be responsible. He was father–a model who showed us how to stay the course until it turned. There are a lot of things I could say, but I’m in my feelings right now—especially about how he loved and empowered his daughter. I never had a father. So, the way he loved Gigi, is how I imagined it would have been like to have a father who loved me enough to stay the course, even after he was untrue. He didn’t use his failings as a reason to bailout. He dealt with the impact on those he loved and restored trust. I wonder if my father knew how much of a missing he has been in my life, would he have been willing to look his failings in the eye and grown instead of retreat?
Please view this 20 minute video to honor and bear witness to an icon. A husband. A father. A Black Man who didn’t leave. Who understood his presence was enough for his baby girls…
I can feel the sadness like a wave about to dash me into the rocks of loss. Crushing me. Drowning me in a missing that stands in for my daddy. I wonder will this missing, this absence that is so LOUD in my heart space, will it ever be filled?
I don’t know.
I don’t know God…
I. Don’t. Know.
I love you,