Dr. Venus Opal Reese

My brother, Tory, is fighting for his life due to COVID-19.

As I write, he is in ICU on a ventilator. I love the Lord and traffic in knowing all things are possible and God is a miracle. Below is my prayer for Tory. Yet as I activate my faith, I think about the 300k+ families who will not share the holidays with a beloved family member–even remotely–this holiday season. I had been praying for the fallen. Now I pray for the families who have to go through this–including my own.

I pray for peace as we each confront the helplessness of not being able to visit a loved one when their lives hang in the balance.

I find myself wanting to blame SOMEBODY for this. I know it’s petty of me and I know life is divinely ordered and yet I feel angry that this is happening to us.

I anxiously wait for the phone to ring afraid of what my sister will say.

And I cry.

Tory is a father.
A son.
A husband.
An uncle.
A nephew.
An entrepreneur.
A provider.

A brother.

The only brother I have.

So this holiday season, I pray for healing–miraculous, wonder-working, supernatural healing for all the families impacted by COVID-19. Whether you lost someone to it or are nursing someone who has it or if you are fervently praying for someone you love to be healed from it, please know you’re not alone. I trust God’s will AND I believe in miracles. All I want for Christmas is healing us all from COVID–the victims as well as those of us who love them.

I know this is not a happy go lucky happy holiday wish. But it’s the best I have right now. Here is my prayer for Tory. Please pray for my family and I will pray for yours too.

I love you.
Dr. Venus

Dear God,

I love you and I trust you. I do not doubt your hand on my life nor your grace and mercy. I have trained myself to not asking for things when I pray.

But I don’t know what else to do right now.

Tory’s in ICU due to COVID. Because it’s COVID, no one, not even his wife, can be with him while he fights for his life. I know I have no right to ask you for anything Lord, but please, if it be in your will, could you please stop by Tory’s hospital bed and let him know he’s loved? That he is not alone in this?

I don’t know if he is conscious or not.

What I do know is you are a miracle worker and you can do anything but fail. Please Lord, spare Tory. It’s a selfish prayer. He’s the only brother I have. It’s the holiday season which is hard on all of us for various reasons. But I know in my blood and bones that miracles happen when you move. Please Lord, I beseech thee for a miracle.

The miracle of Tory’s complete restoration is a gift to me and my family akin to Lazarus’s miracle.

I trust your will God.
And you said to ask.
To seek.
To knock.
I’m asking.
I’m seeking.
I’m knocking.

I’m praying.
I’m trusting.
I’m believing.

I know everything is in divine order.

You have never left or forsaken me.
I know you will not start now.
Your ways are not my ways.
So I praise you in advance for your wonder working power.

Thank you for hearing me out and for coming through.

Let your will be done in this and all things.

In Jesus’ name,
Venus

Dear God,

Forgive my unbelief.

I feel like a hypocrite.

You have covered me before I was born.
You had my father stand for my life while I was conceived.
You put momma in jail to protect my life.

You have protected, provided, & held me close all the days of my life.
Before I inhaled, you loved me.
You chose me.
And you have walked with me through every furnace I have experienced.

You have healed every wound – flesh, mental, emotional – self-inflicted or experienced.

You have given me success very few people on the planet will ever achieve.

You have given me beauty for ashes as a lifestyle, Lord.

I trust you with my life.
But I don’t trust you with my dreams.

Please forgive my unbelief.

I have more faith in what I can see than what you say to me.
I have more faith in what I know than your promise to me.
I have more faith in teaching than writing as my livelihood.

I am such a coward, Lord.

I don’t believe I can make the same kind of money as a screenwriter/creator/producer that I can & have as an internet marketer/mentor/teacher.

I think it will take years to even get in the game.
I think I don’t have connections to get seen.
I think I need to teach while I learn.

I don’t trust that I could just write.

That my voice, my point of view, my words are just as valid as my teaching.

Just as impactful.
Just as powerful.
Just as lucrative.

And then I think, am I being proud?

Am I so attached to what I have accomplished I don’t think I shouldn’t have to start over in a new industry with different rules of engagement? Am I asking for a shortcut?

Should I shut down all I have built over the last 10 years online & get a teaching gig & just write until I sell a show/series? Get offline & just focus totally on breaking into the entertainment industry, which is designed as an apprenticeship model?

See. My mind goes right to teaching at a university again to supplement my dreams.

THAT’S what I am calling my unbelief.

That’s my distrust in you, God.

I trust I can make a living as a teacher in some capacity.
I don’t trust I can make a living SOLELY as a writer/creator in Hollywood.

Help me, Lord.
Heal my unbelief.
Heal my distrust of you.

I trust you with my life, but not my dreams.

I KNOW you love me.
I KNOW you have your hand on me & always have.
I KNOW you will never leave me or forsake me.

But I don’t hold my dreams the way I hold my needs.

You have ALWAYS provided for me – on the streets, school, success.

But those things/spaces/times are essential to staying alive.

They have nothing to do with fulfillment and impact.

I guess I’m saying I trust you to take care of my needs, not my wants.

And yet, you have been whispering in my ear since I was a child, I can help people stop hurting. Television was what I saw with each whisper. But I have never had the courage to try.

From then to now, I don’t trust you with this.

Please heal my unbelief.
I desire that Abraham faith.

I keep seeing this image in my head: Abraham walking with his young son Isaac up the hill to make a sacrifice. Isaac says, “Where is the sacrifice?” & Abraham says without missing a beat, “The Lord himself will provide.” He trusted God so much that he placed his most beloved son on the altar, lifted his knife to sacrifice Isaac without zero questioning or doubt.

At the last moment, God stopped Abraham & supplied a ram for the sacrifice instead of Isaac.

I don’t have this level of trust with you, Lord.
I don’t. Not about my dreams.

So I pray you to heal my distrust in you.
I will keep doing what you tell me to do: I hired the scriptwriting consultant. I have put myself in the script anatomy class. I have also put myself in the pilot writing lab.

I have bought books & have started reading the first one.
I am watching the pilots & breaking down the 4-6 acts in each of them.

I am doing what you say, Lord.

And while I don’t trust you with my dreams, I do trust you to heal my unbelief… & at some point, I will trust you like Abraham.

I trust you to tell me what I need to do, what I need to study, what songs to listen to, what Bible verses I need to memorize to release unshakeable trust in you with everything.

Not just my survival but my Calling.

I trust you to heal my unbelief. My distrust in You.

You are my God.
And I love you with all that I am.
Thank you for loving me just as I am.
Flawed & fickle.

Thanks for hearing me out.
For understanding.
For drawing me close to you.

You love me specially.

Thank you for growing me, spiritually.

You are so good to me.
I don’t know why you love me so good.
But I am so grateful.

In Jesus’ name.

Amen.

Who else is getting ”prayed up” for the upcoming election and results? I don’t know about you, but I’m trusting God to do God. Whatever the outcome, I’m leaning into the everlasting arms of the great ”I Am.”

While I was doing my prayers last night I felt Spirit lead me to Joyce Myer’s devotional, ”Trusting God Day By Day.”

I felt peace hug me.

As I was checking out, these other two treasures revealed themselves: ”Worry Less Pray More: A Woman’s Devotional Guide To Anxiety-Free Living, ” (you know this one fits me!) and ”Prayer Journal For Women.” The last one has space (trim tab) to write in it along with quotes.

Simply put: I trust you, Lord.

I do not worship at the altar of fear.
You are my God. I traffic in Spirit, not in the flesh.

No man.
No President.
No political party.
No voter suppression.
No militia.
No sheets.
No threats.
No intimidation.
No I uncounted ballots.
No lynchings.
No pepper spray.
No whips.
No tar & feathering.
No rigged SC appointments.

NO WHITE MAN PLAYING GOD–
will I EVER bow down and worship at his altar of hate and fear-mongering.

I trust you, Lord, with it all.

KNOWING that no matter how it looks, the outcome, or how I may or may not feel, you ALWAYS give me beauty for ashes.

Fear and faith cannot occupy the same space at the same time.

I worship at the altar of faith.

In Jesus name,
So be it.
So it is.
Ase.
And amen.